An affair with death

“The most painful goodbyes are the ones never said and never explained” – By someone.

In my 32 years of life, I have seen my two mothers (Mother and grandma) die of lung disease. I lost my father suddenly when my daughter turned 6 months old. Loosing the people who brought you up is heartwrenching. This year brings another death in our family. My uncle passed away today. He was suffering with multiple problems from past few month and was in ICU kept alive by a ventilator machine. He was a healthy person who started a third career as a manager at a relative’s office after retirement. He had been a business man all his life. Owned textile factories in his 30s and setup his own business with a famous Indian brand wholesale agency in his 50s.  After retirement he couldn’t sit at home and started working again. He had a good life living with his family (wife, son, daughter-in-law,  father). He used to go for walks every day with my aunt.

Suddenly,one day he fell sick with diabetes, jaundice, later with infection and then lung fibrosis. All these problems arose in a span of 4 weeks. It was like someone had pulled the trigger on his life.

Ever since the doctors confirmed that there was no hope left for him, I started thinking about life and death.  What is the purpose of life? Everything new born thing is fragile at start, gets stronger with age, starts withering after a while, becomes fragile again and dies. This is the circle of life for every being on Earth. A constant relationship exists between life and death from the moment we are conceived. Sometimes, external forces play a role in the start of our affair with death. But an affair it is when our time is up. We have so many to dos in our life’s list that we forget the actual purpose of life- To LIVE HAPPILY. So, why don’t we accept the fact, ignore life’s to do list and just have two to dos that is to be Happy and take care of our health.

As my husband says, life is a paradise when we are happy :-).


Critics..why do we need them?

Blogging has been a journey that has taught, inspired & kept me going.  My first blog was a disaster. I had published only one post & had cribbed about a certain problem from start to finish. I also got a critical comment which made me angry & I felt like chasing down that fellow & demanding an explanation, perhaps give him a kick. I couldn’t do that as he was an unknown person, a good thing. As time passed, I realized how important critics are. My husband & brother are my biggest critics. To be honest, I used to get annoyed at them when they said my post was not good enough or that picture could be better. But soon I realized that they were the reason I was pushing myself to be better at blogging & photography.

Who are/is the critic in your life & how do they affect your work/creativity?

Critics approved photograph 😉

Living outside the network


Social Slang

We went to San Juan Islands for Thanksgiving along with nine friends flying in from different states. While driving to the rented holiday house, ATT gave us a surprise by having no coverage in that area. No coverage meant no calls, no access to Google maps, Facebook or email. My first thought was “No coverage. Wow! So this would be an actual holiday”. We got out of the car, looked at the sky & awed at the billion stars in the sky. Ours was the last car to arrive. We went inside & the house was cozy, warm & inviting. There was a bookshelf, music system, a piano & a fully equipped kitchen with cook books & a dozen of games. The first seat I took was in front of the piano. It was beautiful. I played Fleur de Lise, a tune that I learned on my iPhone piano app and fell in love with the piano. I decided that this was as an opportunity to learn more tunes & I would play it as long as I was on the islands. A time away from work, computer, TV & all of social media. Basically, no connection outside the island. But soon I came to know that the house was WIFI equipped as well. I quickly hopped on to the network & clicked on the Facebook app out of habit. In the next few days, we all played games, went for hiking, had a camp fire, sang songs, laughed, played the piano & had a good time. All with minimum access to social media and it was fun. We were living outside of the network.

So, today as I was reminiscing our last weekend, I realized the amount of time we spend on social media like Facebook, Twitter, Google+ etc. Our generation is hooked to social media & sometimes it feels like we thrive on it. I agree it has brought us closer to friends, relatives & those classmates who were forgotten after graduation. But, in spite of these social sites being a way to get in touch, they have become the only way of being in touch. Now-a-days, instead of calling a friend we tweet, chat or write on their wall, instead of gathering to play games we play online, we convey birthday wishes & sometimes even death condolences online. I find people looking at their phone screens while traveling, standing, walking & eating. I am no better either. But, as I realize this infecting web of networking, I try to walk with my phone in pocket or leave it at home, I try to stay away from computer in the evenings by cooking.

I like social sites & cannot deny the happiness I feel when I share photos, comments, status messages etc. with my friends & family. It does help a lot in being away but still quite close. But, aren’t we getting too much attached to this infectious logical world? Aren’t we inclined to choose virtual conversations over live ones with folks in front of us? Aren’t we stopping ourselves from learning new things by being too much involved in networking?

May be we will have social networking rehab centers in future. What do you think?